Sunday, February 12, 2012

The Blues

If I was a song writer I would be putting out some seriously depressing stuff this month.

I just haven't been able to get out of my funk. I've been moody and irritable for weeks, and it's really getting the better of me. It hasn't been good for relationships and it hasn't been good for productivity either. I've likely killed one friendship, and I'm just not feeling good about graduate school at the moment either. I've been asking myself a lot lately "Why am I doing this?"

In other horrible news, my friend Wolf is in the hospital in a coma. He suffered traumatic brain injures when he was hit at 4pm on Friday by a drunk driver while he was on his scooter, and I'm impatiently waiting to find out what's going to happen next. He was in critical condition as of yesterday, and they have no idea if or when he is going to wake up. The news of this happening really shocked me. He is a former student of mine, a nice guy, and I would see him around campus pretty regularly. I can imagine very few things more unfair happening to a person, and this kind of thing is completely preventable. I really feel for the family, the uncertainty of the situation has got to be awful.

Uncertainty. I think that's the biggest thing bothering me. Uncertainty with everything. While I like surprises, not knowing what the future holds is scary, especially when things aren't going the way you thought they would.

4 comments:

  1. What are the primary areas of uncertainty that are contributing the most to your stress level?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I feel like late winter and early spring in New Mexico can be pretty hard on people. I'm not sure why, but I've noticed it year after year, that a lot of people enter this sort of fugue state where everything seems stuck and a little hopeless. So, I don't mean to trivialize the details, just saying that there might be some seasonal amplification going on. This is a strangely dark time of year, even when the sun's shining. That whole Lent-before-Easter thing? Yeah, ok, that's all i got.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I see what you're saying Christian, but I lived in central PA for 7 years.

    ReplyDelete