Friday, January 6, 2012

Ten Years?

I suppose the math works. I was reminded yesterday that this year will mark the 10th anniversary of my high school graduation. It doesn't seem possible, but sure enough, yeah that happened that long ago.

The whole reason I was reminded of this was that some folks are starting to plan the reunion. We didn't have a 5th year, so there is some anxiety about having this one be good. Here are my thoughts on the whole thing.

Will I go? I'm not sure yet. I graduated high school, kept in touch with the people I cared to, and moved on with my life. Only in very few instances did I ever look back: wishing I hadn't swooned so much over certain people, wishing I had paid more attention in math and history (I especially wish this now), wishing that I had practiced my instrument more... I know some people who LOVED high school, and it was the time of their lives. I have no particular affection for where I went to school, or for that time in my life, and frankly my life now is pretty good. My friendships were spread over many graduating years, so it's not like it will be a grand reunion of all my old buddies. Sure, I graduated with some of my friends, but many of the more lasting relationships I have now are with people who were a year or two ahead of or behind me. My favorite teacher is dead, although I know that few teachers would 1) be invited to this thing or 2) want to go to it.

Maybe it will be fun. Maybe it will be amusing. Or maybe I'll see that girl who was unkind to me, married with children to some rich doctor/lawyer/engineer. Where am I in life right now? I don't feel like I've been unsuccessful, I'm just taking longer to get to where I want and need to be. I can't relate to these people. I'm not married. I want kids, but not for another 4 years or so. Is it weird I'm still in school? I'm surrounded every day by people who are in the same "place" as me, but I realize this maybe isn't normal in the global population. This isn't how everyone else does it. I go on Facebook and see that a lot of people my age are married (some divorced) and have kids. Some are working on their second or third baby. I have two degrees, and I'm working on a third one. My plans have just been different.

I graduated from a class of about 330 people. Honestly, I would estimate that I've only interacted with about 3% of them in some form or another over the past 10 years, max. The rest I either don't know (in a school that big you just don't meet everyone) or am indifferent about. And it's not like I'm a snob, either. I have nothing to be snobby about. I know how some people viewed me back then, as sarcastic, loud, and opinionated. I have news for them: not much has changed, except that my opinions are now more developed, and I have an even lower tolerance for other peoples' BS. I suppose I'm slightly better about my own volume control.

I guess I'll see how this whole reunion thing develops, and then I'll make my decision. Timing would be a major determining factor. It would actually make me happy to see some people I've missed over the last decade.

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